merry christmas.

well i have to start with i had an amazingly fun day .
i love spending time with my family ..
laughing , talking , opening presents , and even playing wii =)
i have to say overall the best present today was my fish .
i was so excited .
i cried .
it was great !
i love him . i have named him artie , and he likes to party ..
although all of this was a great add onto my day ,

hope you all had an amazing christmas as well .

life as we know it ,

hm , so their is not much to say thats new .
went to the movies with my friends tonight.
it was a pretty great time .
we saw yes man . and i laughed like pretty much the whole time .
im really excited for christmas .
yesterday i got some lovely socks from my cousin kayleigh.
thank you very much dear.
they are very warm and pretty.
=)

...

so whats its been a couple days since i have written ,
and their is not much new to say
im pretty excited my brother will be home for the holiday season tonight.
i miss him alot ,
and also another point to mention is my lack of christmas shopping.
yes i will be starting that saturday afternoon =)
lol . im a little behind.
i guess its better than the 24th right .
also , what else ...
oh tanning has become frustrating .
apparently i have missed way more appointments than i actually have,
and im on their targetted list ,
and they want me to pay them back before i can go tanning,
which is stupid .
cause i have not missed that much,
and second .. whats the point ??
like its not like i used any of their electricity and made their bill higher ?

anywho i gotta run

a song .

you take a deep breath and walk through the doors,
it's the morning of your very first day.
you say hi to your friends you ain't seen in awhile
and try to stay out of everybody's way.
-
it's your freshman year
your gonna be here for the next 4 years
hopin' one of those senior
will wink at you and say
you know i haven't seen you round here before.
-
cause when your fifteen and somebody tells you they love you
your going to believe them
and when your fifteen
feeling like theirs nothing to figure out.
-
count to ten
take it in
this is life before you know who you're going to be
-
you sit in class next to miss popular
and soon enough you're best friends
laughing at the other girls
who think they're so cool
if only you knew what you were getting into
-
and then you're on your very first date
and he's everything you dreamed of
and you're feelin like flyin
and you're thinkin he's the one
and you're dancin around the room when the night ends
-
cause when you're fifteen and somebody tells you they love you
you're gonna believe them
and when you're fifteen
and your first kiss makes your head spin around
you think this is love
-
but in your life you'll do things
greater than dating the boy on the hockey team
i didn't know it at fifteen
-
when all you wanted
was to be wanted
wish you could go back
and tell yourself what you know now
-
back then I swore I was gonna marry him someday
but I realized some bigger dreams in life
and you gave everything you had
to a boy who changed his mind
And you cried - broken
-
cause when you're fifteen and somebody tells you they love you
you're gonna believe them
and when you're fifteen
don't forget to look before you fall
-
I've found time can heal most anything
and you just might find who you're supposed to be
I now know who I'm supposed to be
at fifteen

i will explain for you auntie darlene .

old school.

my thoughts.

YYYYYYYYEAAAAH OLD AGAIN.

update .

so I've kinda disappeared for a few days .
so figured its time to write the first December post.
it's getting colder here ,
and we have lots of snow .
but it's pretty !
I'm so thankful that daddy is alright.
he was hit by a drunk driver the other day.
our car is totaled , but he is alright
thank goodness !

otherwise all has been well.
school is keeping me busy.
as well as dance.
and i can't wait for Christmas! =)

last night , and more thoughts

oh did we ever have a good timee last night.

it was my friend christinas going away party.

she is leaving early tomorrow to return home to germany.

so we all threw her a surprise party.

it was alot of fun.

terina and i were incharge of decorations , and we went pretty insane .

it was fun .

than after christina arrived

we played a game ,

kinda like truth or dare.

but their was dares inside the balloons and you had to pop the balloon than do your dare.

i had to smell someones shoe for 10 seconds ..

oh christina had to call a random boy

it happened to be someone off my phone that she doesnt even know .

and we blocked it , so they wouldnt see my number come up .

and than this is how the conversation went

her - hey sweetheart

him - hi

her - whatcha up to there babe

him - nadda you

her - oh just thinking about you

i was wondering if you waned to go on a date with me

him - who is this

her - its me

him - and who is me

her - as if you dont even know

i thought you loved me

wow good job you broke me heart

..

you should have heard this guys voice,.

he was like what is going on.

priceless.

she ended up having to hang up cause she and all of us were laughing so hard.

after this game .

we kinda were all sitting around talking .

than the boys started dancing ,

so us girls joined in .

after that we were all getting pretty dang tired

so we went back to just sitting around ,

but overall it was a really fun night.

i love spending time with all the internationals.

you are all so amazing ,

and super fun to be around.

christina!

im gonna miss you so much babe.

i love you to death ,

and those couple days in dance class together were great fun.

i hope we keep in touch ,

and maybe in the future get to see each other again.
it was really great meeting you deary

friends forever and for always

so now im sitting here on the couch

feeling like im at least 90

also admiring my christmas tree.

its kinda an on going process.

one day we set it up ,

the next the lights went on.

a couple days later the bulbs and now the topper, and the pretty flower things.

once its done i will take a picture .

well i think im ready to stop typing,

my hands are kinda starting to hurt a bit .

nighty night.

oh ps auntie darlene we need to have a phone conversation one of these days.

i miss hearing your voice .

oh and possibly even a late night chick flick somewhere in there to !

ah . i miss you and cant wait to come back to smithers

kinda frustrated .

so yesterday i finally talked to my tap teacher.

and she didn't seem to impressed with me .

i told her how i honestly felt , and she did the same back.

everytime i told her how upset i was with the way im being treating

she simply replyed "sure"

and she still needs to think about giving me back my solo and trio .

ughh !

this is ridiculous.

my mom and i agree that if this is the way things ae gonna be were leaving.

i feel bad thinking that way ,

and i feel like it some sort of a dumb reason to leave.

but i do not come to dance every day to be told that i can't have something

that i work so hard for .

i practice and practice and practice.

and in those 3 classes i missed , i missed 4 steps.

well ... have we ever done those again . hm NO !

we sure have not .

but i mean honestly if she just shows me them ,

i can practice them ,

and no longer be behind .

but no instead she just assumes that i miss dance

to sit at home on the couch .

which is clearly not the reason.

i give up so much ,

i go above and beyond to show that i am dedicated.

i barely have much of a social life.

because im always at the studio.

i dont hang out with my friends outside of school ...

becuase after school i go to .. hmm DANCE!

and im sure saying all this about how i feel makes dance seem stressful

and probably not to well liked .

thats not the case.

i love dance .

dance is amazing.

but i will admit its become far to stressful.

i always knew that everyone has their year

where their just uber frustrated ..

and this year is that year for me .

i some time hate going to class just because i hate being pushed aside

and just one of the ones who are there .

thats my rant .

and im done for now

cause im in class and have work to do ..

pictures

there we go.
finally
here are pictures of the baby
i actually miss her.
some of my friends had the baby during the week
and i totally just wanted to steal her
and take her home!
but i can't

tonight is my friend's sweet 16 party.
were going skating,
and than heading off to her house.
than spending the night.
it should be alot of fun!
i'll put pictures up tomorrow =)

..

so i handed in my baby first thing monday morning

ended up with 97% , =)

turns out even after all the stress of a baby

i was still a good mom ,

i haven't been up to much.

just been going through some stress.

this past week has been hard.

i've felt as if the most imporant thing to me was slipping out from under my feet.

i felt like the thing i had worked so hard and felt i deserved

was completely taken away from me.

i am 100% dedicated to what i do ..

and always have been .

and than just ugh everything

all my emotions came flying up.

the fact that we are all treated so unfairly.

people our favoured and given better treatment.

i mean if it were any of those 4 people they would not have gotten

the same punishment as me

and i mean i dont ever just not go to stay at home and sit around.

no i had problems with migranes at the beginning of the year.

and than i had whiplash

and than i had a huge project.

she is lucky i even came and danced full out when i hurt my neck

because i wasn' supposed to.

i was supposed to stay home and relax

but no i danced.

and plus beginning of the year i had mono still,

and i wasn't supposed to dance at the beginning of the year.

dancing waas defntely not the easiest thing.

it took alot out of me ,

and left me with little to no energy

but i still went because i love it and am commited.

i give up so much other oppurtunities to dance.

to do competitions.

and i dont think taking my solo away is the right option ..

or well a deserved punishment

because i work hard ,

always have

and i will continue to because dance is my life.

ah ,

so yes i have realized what this babies purpose kinda is.

possibly to show me that being a parent isn't easy.

its not.

even when she's not crying and im taking a nap

i feel like im in the lightest sleep ever,

because i know im responsible for caring for the baby.

right now she has not been to bad.

cranky a bit .

hopefully this means tonight i can get some sleep.

but yes babies for me are FAR FAR FAR away.

i'd rather just hold other peoples babies,

and be an aunt eventually.

and than in like 10 years have some children.

no children for me .

ok so im guessing this is normal

and i shouldn't really complain

but come on !

i need sleep to you know .

but nope she didn't know.

she woke me up almost every 2 hours or so .

im extremely exhausted .

and that was just night 1 of 3.

than this morning i have an hour ballet class ..

and for the first 15 minutes i got to dance !

the rest was interrupted by crying .

now i have more rehearsals at 2 -4:30

hopefully since this is competition stuff

i will be able to participate in class more.

the first fourty minutes

ok so its cried three times already !

first i couldnt figure out how to get it to beep

meaning it knows im here.

than baby needed to be feed for 20 minutes.

just as i was about to put her back in the carrying thing

she started crying again

needing to be burped ..

oh than a couple minuts later needed it diaper changed.

and this was just fourty minutes of the 63 hours.

oh dear .

im gonna be tired by the end of the weekend.

and im due friday !

haha.

yes mom i know.

i was waiting till today to put the second part.

yes tomorrow im going to be a mom for the weekend.

i get my family studies baby from 4pm friday - 7am monday.

we have a pretty busy weekend me and baby

so hopefully all goes well

and i can get in some sleep.

i swear if it crys to much it just might end up in the snow !

KIDDING

i wouldn't do that.

it'll be alot of fun.

im looking forward to it.

pictures tomorrow .

im gonna be a mom .

yes.

thats all their is to say !

im gonna be a mom

webcam

so i should probably explain.

last night i updated my webcam program

and it had some wicked cool setting.

such as these ...

this one is by far the best of the night.

we got the horse teeth.

than i apparently grew a second chin.

and have some nerd glasses!

haha.

the alien setting.

i was trying to be a mean one!

can anyone guess who i am?

possibly toilet paper . HA

big nose

horse teeth!

haha
this actually makes me laugh.

big eyes !

oh once again im an alien.

we had a pretty good time with this new thingy.

LOL

saturday.

so on saturday we went to a wedding.

congratulations james and erin!

we took lots of pictures

here are some =)

this is the dress i wore ,

i had bought it specifically for the wedding

and was so excited to finally

wear it!

cassie + i

haha.

being silly.

me before we left

us sisters ,

i love you both so much!

my eyes looked crazy in this picture

their really green!

but yeah saturday was a really fun day.

the wedding was super cute

i cried.

than we came home had some Kraft Dinner

at least Cassie and I did.

than we went and finished decorating

at the reception hall.

it looked so gorgeous in there!

than it was supper.

than dessert.

than the party started and we danced!

had alot of fun.

=)

my week ,

last weekend .. november 1st + 2nd

we went to triple threat dance convention.

it was so fun.

i learned so much, and all the teachers were so inspirational !

on the down side,

i did end up with some pretty wicked whiplash ..

so i've been going to the chiropractor.

and its starting to get better.

-

than tuesday was my birthday

it was a really great day.

my friends decorated my locker,

and than i went to auntie linette's for lunch

and it was SO good !

-

wednesday ..

the WSO came and played .

their were really good ,

and than we got out of school at 12:10

-

yesterday was a slack school day LOL .

than after school me , edna , maria and kelsey

went to the hockey game .

we walked there , and due to the snow

we had SUPER wet feet when we got there.

so we ended up going back to my house ,.

and each getting some fuzzy socks to put on once we got back

to the game.

than ..

maria and i were singing
" hey hey you you i dont like your girlfriend "

to loser ..

i laughed . lol i dont know if she thought it was funny tho .

-

today , well i had my grade 8 teacher as a sub.

she surprisingly got off her spazzy stage

and is now super nice .

she was like talking to me all class,

and i defintely got no work done ,

but we didnt have anything really to do .

just our study guides

and i have one page left ..

than daniel picked me up from school

and now im sitting here ..

than im going to youth group soon .

were going to the canton downtown ..

for some all you can eat chionese food !

o nom nom

it shall be good !

-

now after youth ..

cassie is sleeping over.

and than its james and erins wedding tomorrow.

cassie + i are gonna curl each others hair n such ..

and get all dressed up pretty n such !

shall be a fun day !

-

than monday and tuesday = NO SCHOOL !!

dance

so i mentioned before the dance was last night .

these are two pictures one of my friends sent me.

im still waiting for more.

kelsey and i
edna + i slow dancing LOL

bineu

so yesterday mom and i decided to spend some time together during my spare and lunch hour.

we headed over to co-oop to get some gas , than to wal-mart .. i forget why .

than to petland to get some dog food.

we decided to look @ the dogs really quick.

and we both fell head over heels in love with a black lab/chesapeake bay retriever.

he is the cutest little guy ever.

only nine months old,

and has amazing green eyes.

his name is bineu and he is just super cute overall ..

last night i went to the school dance.

i changed my costume due to no time to get the otherone ready

and was a cow girl.

i wore a plaid shirt, shorts, boots, and a cowboy hat .

when i get pictures from my friends i will post some.

until than ..

byee .

the ballet.

i forgot to mention this.

thursday evening my dance class went to the ballet.

it was amazing.

we saw carmina burana.

it was kinda more of a contemporary peice

but still extremely amazing ..

these are some pictures we took

friday night + more

so friday night @ youth we had a picture scavenger hunt.

we had to drive around transcona and take pictures of certain things.

it was a really fun night.

so here are some of my pictures.

this one was two team members being pushed in a blue shopping cart.

a team member with a dog toy in their mouth ,
no one would do it so i took one for the team !

jumping infront of the family washroom

@ kildonan place.

hugging a red haired clown .

-

their was alot more but it takes so long to upload them

so im not gonna.

but ..

this is to my auntie

i was doing the dishes tonight after supper ,

standing around thinking how much funner doing the dishes would be

if you were there .

i miss you lots !

and cannot wait for summer 09'

because i've decided im not going to L.A w/ dance

im going to head over the mountains to smithers !

ahh , i love you auntie darlene!

halloween

i so cannot wait for the dance next wednesday/

setting up for it and all shall be fun.

it kinda sucks tho ,

i havent been able to make it to any meetings for that commitee tho ,

because of tcu .. which i cant miss due to the fact its a credited course.

but anyways . im going with the foreigns ! woo ,

maria , edna + i are going retro style .

shall be fun .

some big fall off the shoulder sweaters,

bright leggings ,

flats ,

and legwarmers ..

than we will backcomb are hair a bit , and all that jazzz.

it will be alot of fun ,

than next friday night we will be going trick or treating .. =)

yeaaaahhh candddyyy , mmmmm !

...

wow , kso i have kinda realized in the past couple days

their might just be this guy i really like .

i mean i have known him for years .

and i have been hanging out with him so much lately ,

and friday it just kinda hit me ,

that i do like him .

hes the kinda guy i have been looking for

he's awesome

a christian ,

he wants to go into missions just like me ..

he is funny ,

outgoing .

just everything .

maybe their are guys out there ,

that are actually worth my time .

well yeah i really like this guy , :)

man alive.

geez.

i have a migrane again !

this just beyond silly now .

i do not understand why i keep getting them.

:)

today was pretty great .

hung out with best people in the world ..

maria , edna , linda , lukas and kelsey.

it was so fun.

cant wait till friday to go to pure + than polo on saturday !

than sunday high school musical 3 ,

wooo ! =)

now in a couple minutes im heading to kyles house ,

to hang out with him , josh and dylan.

shall be fun hopefully !

i havent seen them all in SO long.

oh i got my hair cut yesterday

its disgusting !

i hate it ..

she made it really short when i told her all i wanted was layers , and a bit cut off.

it was like down to my stomach almost ,

and now its by my shoulders ..

ERRGG!

i hope it grows fast again.

cause i liked it better long .

and my bangs are pretty weird too .

maybe its just that its different and im so not used to it ,

hopefully it will grow on me .. and soon i will like it .

but im out , =)

tonight.

so tonight is gonna be pretty great !

youth than im staying at my brothers for the night .

it makes me so excited .

its the first time im gonna stay at his house ,

and i just think its super cool

other than these two things ,

their is nothing super spectacular to say about today ..

so this is about it .

TGIF !

mm so i added this post accidently but have nothing to say

mmmm ..

so today .

well what about today can i write .

school seemed super long and dragged out .

i have realized that in clothing we have made not one thing of clothes since the year has started .

we knitted , and have done theory , and sat around .

its lame . really lame !

than my tcu meeting , ughh my goodness shoot me already !

like the girl already made us sit for one whole day and listen to her talk

and today we had to sit and waste our lunch hour hearing the same things

when i had so many other things i needed to get done.

oh than english rolls around , stank hands back or assignments finally !

its about freaking time , than mentions

oh guys your only looking at your marks on stuff and handing it all back in ...

im sorry does this make any sense .

i thought it went something like ..

student hands in assignment to teacher,

teachers marks it in a couple days .

after a couple days student gets marked assignment back and puts in binder to use to study .

nope apparently with stank it dont work that way.

ughhh !

-

mm , than after school went to the hockey game.

pre good time !

rather than the fact that some certain people i do not exactly enjoy to much were there.

and decided to attempt to start stuff ,

saying stuff that was not true .

it drove me nuts !

-

yeah and than went tanning ,

it felt like it was my only 16 minutes of my day where i just layed back and stopped.

it was nice , i enjoyed it.

than had dance

and now im sitting here thinking

wow , sometimes i wonder how i manage all this in my brain .

ok so this has to do with two previous posts i have written .

the last one and the one titled " seven , i think "

ok so the person i mentioned in the last post had some thoughts on the first picture in "seven , i think"

-

i come home from dance,

come on msn.

and steven starts talking to me , ( the guy sitting behind me in the picture )

he is like one of my best friends !

he came over to chill saturday night , and we invited him in on the picture .

and so im gonna just call him stupid , decides to add steven up on facebook .

-

this just miffs me off ..

like whats the point of that ?

than to right away stupid sends steven a message and says ..
" how do you know aryssa "

and he was like oh i have known her for like years , her mom used to babysit me , and now were just really good friends and all , thats about it .

and stupid replys " oh so your not dating her ? "

steven says no

an he says good .. ??

-

hmmm .. so what does this mean ?

am i not aloud to move on from him ..

cause i think i should be aloud to .

i mean stupid moved on from me .

in a matter of like a couple days ,

when he supposively loved me ?

mhmm right .. makes sense to me

he for sure loved me .. NOT

if he did it would have been a forever type thing ,

because love isnt something that just fades away .

it last forever .

through thick and thin.

-

i need to just stick with my thoughts on this ,

not give into relationships .

im thinking staying single till im 16 is a good idea.

it gives me a year to possibly get to know someone first ..

it gives me another year to continye maturing .

getting my thoughts together on what it means to be inlove

-

i have realized this year

relationships and loves isnt something that is light topic.

it takes all of you , and your emotions.

it takes dedication, commitment .

i dont want anything less than this perfect type of god love describes .

so pretty much imma wait for the right guy to come around .

maybe if i stop looking so hard , he will just find me !

-

ohh aryssa you think to much !

i wonder ,

some times i wonder why im such an idiot about this topic.
i completely stopped talking to you for some time now.
i just gave up .
our relationship didnt work , and after that our friendship didnt seem to work either .
so i gave up.
stopped trying to make everything work.
because their was no hope.
i convinced myself , i am so over him !
i dont want anything to do with him .
im better off without him .
the stressed he caused in my life.
im done with the bad decisions that were influenced by him , and the role he had in my life.
so why today ,
when he came up to me and asked.
hey , and asked if im mad , and if were still friends
i said hey, no im not mad, and of course were still friends.
it seemed like it popped right out of my mouth without even thinking.
i dunno why this bugs me it does.
and their is more .
he is in a relationship with someone now ,
which bugged me at first but i think im finally coming to terms with it .
today at lunch he texted me and said " i made a mistake aryssa "
and i said and that was ?
and he said breaking up with you .
i dunnno .
it makes me wonder
if he is being all like that with me while he has a girlfriend,
how many times did he do that while i was like gone for almost a month with some other girl .
you know ?
i know some of you dont like him .
and i wanna make it clear to you all that this post is not me sitting here confessing im head over heels for him or anything .
just the fact that still to this day my mind wanders when it comes to any topic involving him.
i cant take back anything that happened,
it happened,
but if i could just erase it all .
completely i would.
because maybe something good could have come from me + him ., you know ?
and i will tell anyone . anyone ,
peer pressure , or whatever its called when its from your boyfriend ..
dont fall for it .
stay true to your morals ,
stay true to who you are ..
never let anyone tell you that you are less of a person than you are .
expect them to respect you , and if they dont . its not worth it ..
you cannot change who they are ,
as much as you might want to you cant.
and last but not least never short change yourself , thats the best advice my auntie ever gave me ,
sorry for kinda just saying anything about this topic i needed to get it off my head

I LOVE MY AUNTIE .

ok so im starting with the most important topic of the day.

my mom calls me before she leaves for vegas and says i have a letter from my cousin.

so i open it , and whats inside ??

my lovely aunt who i love to death .

got me a starbucks card ! wooo .

thanks auntie darlene .

i totally would have called and thanked you but im not sure when i will be at my house,

cause nana doesnt have unlimited long distance.

btw auntie darlene ..

i miss youu ..

like nutso crazy.

im totally up for some cookie dough and a chick flick and the bacon of course ..

NO TURKEY BACON !

lol the real junk ,

hopefully i will get to come and see you guys again this summer.

i might just cry if i dont get to ,

but at least i will see you for joshs wedding!

-

what else .

oh mom + dad are off to vegas.

they just texted me saying they were on the plane from denver to vegas

and yeah.

thats pretty exciting

-

hmm , im starting tanning again tomorrow,

so now i dont have to be all pasty and white.

which is EXCITING stuff

-

well as for now ,

im gonna get ready for dance.

probably will write alot in the next bit

since i will be bored probably.

seven , i think !

kso after mom and dad's party on saturday, we planned to have some people over for a bonfire, well this didnt really work out to well because it started raining. and also the only person who isnt part of the fam that ended up coming over was steven. but we ended up still having a good time. we watched what happens in vegas. it was SO funny.

so i guess all their is to say about this picture is ..
that i hope this is our sister 'group'
complete!

because i honestly love all three of you !

and you all mean so much to me !

mmmm. i love family !

thanksgiving

so first off thanks to everyone for last night + helping us out.

it was so incredibly appreciated.

the party for mom and dad ended up being a sucess ,

and i am so glad it was,
after the work i put into planning everything.

i admit yes, we had a very stressful day with drama between us kids,

but we worked it out in the end,

and had a great time last night.

i hope mom and dad enjoyed their time as much as we did.

-

today was a pretty great day too,

minus that i am exhausted.

went to church , came home had some lunch .

took a two hour nap ! =)
and than had thanksgiving dinner

w/ mom, dad, daniel. cassie, donovan, auntie sharon, oma + opa !
it was really good.

-

now im already thinking i just might head off to bed.

but i also just wanna say how thankful i am for so many things god provides for me.

my family. my education, the nice house we have, my friends .. and so on

also.. just in general im so thankful for god ,

that he is my constant support.

he provides for me ,

and loves me unconditionally,

and its amazing !

-

ok - so now im out.. this head ache i still have is taking a toll on me ..
and i need sleep !

night !

hockey game yesterday .

k i know i just wrote something but i thought of something i shall write.

yesterday i went to the hockey game with some of the international students.
and boy oh boy did i have a great time !
maria and i were going out of the arena cause we were cold ,
and im a little stupid sometimes and tripped on the stairs . HAHA
it was funny, funny, funny.
than we were like talking bout how greg is maria's boyfriend .. :)
just cause the guy sitting infront of us liked maria + she doesnt like him.
ugh im gonna miss all of them when they leave .
oh ps - i met my future boyfriend LOL he is from germany :):)

four .

so i had my training for the credit union today.

and my brain hurts.

LOL
its good for me tho.

-

anyways my brother is home tonight !
WOO !

im pre excited to see him ,

i miss him so much.

and his help this weekend will be so appreciated
-
i think thats all for now,

maybe more later tonight.